F**K YOU Baby Buttons! & Other Annoying Baby Things!
Right from the moment that you see that positive line on the white stick that 3 minutes ago you peed on, to the first scan, first kick, first cry and first ever cuddle we get excited about the prospect of our little ones... or at least I did once I got over the initial OH MY GOD... HOLY CRAP! moment when I found out I was pregnant. It truly was ayy-mazing. I couldn't wait for
my first cuddle which felt like a long time coming but once I started I never wanted to stop.
Now one of the things I enjoyed in the run up to becoming a mummy was going out and buying lots of lovely clothing for my beautiful little girl and people were so generous in their gifts as well. I swear... her wardrobe before she was born was better than my adult wardrobe has ever been - she had more bloody designers too! Anyway, putting the green-eyed clothes monster away... it was fun! Fast forward a few months later and OH BOY! How many of those purchases do I regret?!? Well, quite a few actually. It's all very well and good buying cute, adorable, pretty little outfits.... but did I check that they were poppers and not buttons? Nope, I didn't. ALL PARENTS TO BE LISTEN TO THIS WARNING.... BUY POPPERS!!! Poppers are amazing... they're easy. A few clicks and you are all done... buttons on the other hand are the bane of my life and are something I can only imagine were sent up from hell by the devil to test the patience of every parent out there!
Don't get me wrong, I've been doing my own buttons since I was little... apparently my mum says I am quite good at doing my own now too! But baby buttons?!?! NO NO NO! They are so tiny... so you can't grip them and nine times
out of ten the bloody button hole is too small for the sodding button!!!! Brrreeaaattthhheee! So you can see that baby buttons annoy me just a little and when choosing an outfit for Alyssa for the day, tend to work around buttons... especially now she can wriggle... A LOT!
Along the same lines as buttons is another pet peeve of mine when it comes to baby clothes... items of clothing that do up.... at the back!! I mean, what are we supposed to do... turn our babies over, face plant them into the changing mat and hope they can breathe for long enough whilst we attempt to do up 3 of the stupid bloody baby buttons that we can't do on front fastening outfits let alone the back?! It is much
easier now that I have a baby that can sit up to be able to do anything up at the back... but she moves! She wriggles. She tries to get at and eat anything that is or isn't within her reach! So seriously?!?! Back fastening clothing?!?! No, No and No once again!
My final peeve when it comes to baby clothes is one I am sure you will all share with me... over the head baby gros! I mean come on?!?! I get that it might mess up their pretty design of the baby gro to have a front fastening but... have you met babies?!?! They HATE HATE HATE stuff going over their heads! Until you get to a point where you can play peepo, which some babies still do not even accept, no baby is ever ever going to enjoy
you pulling clothes over their heads! Half the time the holes are much smaller than they should be and won't comfortably go over a baby's head anyway!
Ooo, Ooo, sorry that's not my last peeve because I thought of another!! How LONG are the sleeves of baby's clothing?!?! Unless you have miraculously just birthed an Orangutan, the sleeves will always always always be wayyyyy too long! I put Alyssa's arm in a newborn cardigan the other day and the body didn't fit obviously, but the arm was the perfect length to wrist!!! UMMMMMM.... this there may be a malfunction in the measuring department peeps?!?
I must say thank you all for letting me get this out! It's been building up for a while and the other day I actually swore at a button (my new low point) so felt it needed to be "word-vommed" onto a page. A final point I would like to mention is that I do in fact love dressing my child and making her look so cute and pretty. So if the lovely manufacturers could stop making clothing in a really frickin annoying way, I'd be golden! Until then.... F**K YOU BUTTONS!!!
What are your baby clothes pet peeves?
